Dear Families,

 

This weekend, our sixth, seventh and eighth grade girls’ volleyball teams are competing in the CYO playoffs. Today at the end of the day, all of our classes lined the hallways, high fiving and cheering the teams and wishing them well as players jogged through the building.  
 
Sports are important. My dad taught and was a high school coach for over sixty years. He loved what he did.  At the end of his life, when things were really starting to go sideways for him, my dad smiled at my mom and said, “I got to live the life I wanted.”  
 
My dad was fiercely competitive. He really liked winning.  One of his sayings was, “There are poor losers and good pretenders.” My dad was also a very principled man.  Another favorite saying was, “Win with humility and lose with grace.” My dad was a good man. 
 
Like my dad, I grew up strongly preferring winning to losing- to be honest, to this day, given a choice, I still do. But after almost 40 years of watching kids arguing on the playground, and since it has been over a decade since my children played on their high school teams, I have gained a lot of perspective on what’s important when it comes to playing a game.  
 
Here’s what I now believe matters.  

• Play by the rules. When you choose to play a game, you have chosen to follow the rules of the game.  The rules haven’t changed because you have joined the game.  Following the agreed upon rules shows that you are a person with integrity. 
• Keep playing. Don't squabble over the small stuff or the occasional bump. Play on.
• Be respectful of your teammates, your opponents and anyone else involved in the game.  Everything goes better when we treat others and are treated with respect.
• Keep trying and do your best.  In the end, win or lose, you will know that you did all you could. Other people will appreciate it too.
• Teams and teammates matter. They teach us how to work and play together. Adults who are still close friends with their childhood teammates rarely remember the number of games they won together. They care about the people who had their backs and supported them. Good teams and teammates do that.

 
This weekend, three of our CYO teams are playing in the CYO volleyball play-offs.  Whether they win or lose, the players have already achieved what was most important. They have worked hard, played together, and done their best.  Each is part of a team that lifts them up. In the end, isn’t that what we really want for our children?  
 
Okay- I am my father's daughter.  Winning is nice, too.  
 
Breathe. Pray. Be kinder than you think necessary. Thank you for being a community that, win or lose, lifts each other up. Reach out if you can help or need help.

 

Peace and blessings,
Rosemary Leifer